Fall five.

[RBW 23 Zipper jeans + Vanessa Mooney Nebulous Statement necklace + Heather maxi dress + Cheap Monday Sheet blouse from Need/Supply + Luela cardigan from Need/Supply.]

While we’re waiting for me to cobble together some pictures of me to accompany the next creative series post, let’s talk about fall. It’s my favorite season. But not for sentimental reasons. [I don’t drink Starbucks, follow college football, or take selfies of myself in colorful leaves next to dog logs.]

Cheaper AC bills, being outside without melting, no-humidity hair, and layers with out the seasonal affective disorder? Sure, I’ll bite.

I spent the entire summer getting rid of clothes. Piles and piles of clothes. And armed with this new minimalist philosophy, I want to stay streamlined and I’ll boldly start with the time of year when I buy the most massive amounts of unnecessary stuff: Fall.

Five articles. Five. And here they are.

(1) Crazy printed jeans with Sid V. zippers from Rag & Bone: because my rock tees are burned out on denim, they’ll look smokin’ with nasty black boots, and even with a white button-up shirt, they’re the slice of edge I’ve been subconsciously craving in almost everything I buy these days. Just a leetle bit mean—that’s where it’s at.

I’m an eternal sucker for 90s plaid and punk zippers, but in a way that they aren’t setting off any metal detectors or dress code alarms.

I’m pretty sure I used to only shop for statement pieces. And it was a total disaster.

Can’t commit to next-generation buffalo plaid? I’ve tried this flannel shirt on in Need’s brick and mortar down the street three times—three times—and haven’t pulled the trigger yet. Might be time.

(2) A freaky collar necklace from Vanessa Mooney: because I’m not sure there’s enough turquoise left in the world and I needed that one piece that freshened up all my remaining possessions. I can’t do boho so much anymore; at least, not implied boho. I like sleek and mean, filed down around the edges. Bandaid look, not stage looks.

My mom used to wear simple, futuristic metal chokers that floated over her collar bone. Total sex. Also, I have a litmus test with jewelry: gotta be effortless, proportioned, and doable. We’re not summoning Manon, here. With: ripped-neck LNA tee and velvet bells for zuzz; a white button-up and inky dark jeans for toujours.

(3) A mind-numbingly easy maxi dress: because part of this winding-down of consumption was eliminating prints, colors, and things that required too much thought to wear more than twice a year. No boho florals. Zero romance. Just slick.

I read this Judith Krantz book called Spring Collection once (so hot… so, so hot) and in it this hopelessly humble assistant editor with a predictably perfect figure has an entire wardrobe from Donna Karan messengered to her office before she leaves for Paris. Every piece she described sounded boring, but endlessly chic: neutrals. Modern silhouettes. Structure and slouch. Trousers. For that reason, Francesca’s clothes stuck with me ever since. Additions: silver coin belt for zuzz; leather jacket and nothing else for toujours.

 A deconstructed blouse in a cool neutral to wear with everything: because it doesn’t fit any seasonal silhouettes, palettes, or notions of what’s chic, it just is.

Shirts like this are the absolute perfect antithesis of clothes I hate, but more than that, they let everything else take center stage: the texture of a wool scarf, a drippy, understated pendant, liquid leather leggings or maybe just rad hair.

These are the shirts that get passed up in favor of prints, peplums and prim details. I see it all the time. A travesty. This shirt is like the Chablis of blouses.

I’ll hang this next to my Alexander Wang tees, LNA tees, and my leather jacket. Fall: done.

A chunky cardigan, minus the grandpa: because you need something to balance out all the zippers and severity if you’re as into naps and kittens as I am. I’m 100% for menswear looks, but the cardigan is a tricky beast. This one has a modern vibe, is glowy but not sweet, and lacks the all-over cables and wooden buttons and dangly crochet bits that photograph well and are essentially cute but lack continuity if you’re into, well, zippers and severity.

I’m no stylist, but I just got rid of an entire armoire of cozy cardigans in all ranges of gauges for precisely this reason. Lesson: not all sweater cardigans are created equal. Unfortunately, they’re also like pizza. They’ll essentially end up being good no matter what, and they’re real hard to resist.

Since we’re bringing coated jeans into the mix, though… this sweater just phoned home, guys. With: a white charmeuse camisole, black coated jeans, and black booties  for zuzz; jeans, a t-shirt and a layered chambray shirt for toujours.

Also recommended: a few cocoon sweater cardigans with fitted sleeves. Man! I can’t get enough of thems, especially this one.

I’ve left off shoes, so… don’t judge me if this becomes the Fall Fifteen with an addendum next week.

Pending any grave misjudgments, that’s it. But if you have better suggestions, send ’em my way.

-C.