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Corks + Caftans

The Rebel’s Manifesto.

March 30, 2010 11 Comments

Before I even started to read this list, I knew it was for me. I am, afterall, Rebel 1.*

I am Rebel 1. I sing “But I got a man,” when the teacher’s back is turned. I frequently sit at an isolated desk in the middle of the room. I smoke Benson & Hedges in the Crews’ greenhouse. I’ve felt the cold stare of the principal—from the good eye, at least. I tell the substitute to bite me. I belch audibly in Algebra.

I am Rebel 1.

[Courtesy artist Keri Smith at her blog wish jar.]

[Wait, where’s 12?]

“Suckers!” This one’s for the rebels. Unite.

-Carey

*The Rebel 2 title belongs to Elizabeth Heslep, who I imagine still holds the rebel cause in her heart, although I haven’t seen her in years.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VvYIpa1Ulvw]

Filed Under: Essays Tagged With: Positive K I Got a Man, The Rebel Manifesto

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Comments

  1. Lizzie O. says

    March 30, 2010 at 2:36 pm

    Shut up. I’m dying this is too funny.

    Reply
  2. Caroline says

    March 30, 2010 at 2:48 pm

    I’m #11 with a little #7 thrown in for kicks. And what’s with skipping #12?

    Reply
    • corksandcaftans says

      March 30, 2010 at 2:50 pm

      Hamric: at St C’s, I was so badly behaved, we dubbed me Rebel. Then when my friend, the other Elizabeth, joined forces with me, we called her Rebel 2. We decorated notebooks and shit with REBEL 1 and REBEL 2. Pretty awesome.

      Reply
  3. robin says

    March 30, 2010 at 4:35 pm

    Ah ha ha ha ha! You went to catholic school too? I almost got kicked out in fifth grade because my uniform skirt was too short and I refused to let my mother buy me a new one that fit properly. (I had been wearing the same one since third, and it was finally the length I wanted it.)

    Reply
  4. Elena says

    March 30, 2010 at 5:32 pm

    I wish I was a rebel. I’d like to think I have the potential, but I have to admit I was the “cautious” one growing up. Always looking before she jumped!

    I guess I’ll have to live vicariously through you lovely ladies! 😉

    Reply
  5. Cami says

    March 31, 2010 at 8:39 pm

    Right…You belch audibly in Algebra…ESPECIALLY when your MOM is the substitute! AARRGGGHH!!!

    Reply
  6. Cami says

    March 31, 2010 at 8:40 pm

    BTW.. I LOVE #4

    Reply
    • corksandcaftans says

      March 31, 2010 at 8:57 pm

      Hahaha I was so hoping you would comment on being the substitute in that class. I was just showing off for you…

      Reply
  7. Lindsay says

    April 1, 2010 at 2:01 pm

    #4 is my favorite! my e-mail signature actually has a quote from an old school golfer, sam snead, that relates: “Forget your opponents, always play against par.” Glad to have discovered your blog…also the “I Gotta Man” took me right back to middle school 🙂

    Reply
    • corksandcaftans says

      April 1, 2010 at 2:15 pm

      I saw that in your signature! I love Sam Snead; I watched him hit golfballs at the Greenbrier once, where I used to go as a kid. I’m a golfer, so I can relate 🙂

      Thanks for the sweet comment!

      Reply

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Forward Observer for the Donut Squad. I write and drink things in Richmond, VA

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